Re: Josh Groban
Dear Joshua Q. Groban,
Thank you for responding to my blog post. For a brief 2.2 seconds, I thought that you were indeed Josh Groban and my heart was bursting with excitement. Alas, I realized soon enough that you were merely an imposter, as Josh is unaware of my proclivity to read Robert Jordan and medical textbooks until the wee hours of the morning. Furthermore, Josh would know that his middle name was Winslow, not Q.
I ask the fake Josh Groban to please stand up. I can no longer sleep at night because of you; the mystery of Josh Groban continuously haunts me. I stay awake analyzing the 10 or so people who know about my blog, trying to match them up with your writing style, your knowledge of my personal interests, and your attraction to turtles. Is it possible that I have already interrogated you and you lied to me? Or have I not suspected you yet?
Either way, I would greatly appreciate a response. In my last post, I said, "Josh, if you're reading this, call me." I would like to add a "fake" to the beginning of that sentence. I'll even throw in a "please." I will be anxiously awaiting your call.
Love,
Tina
ps. I would just like to add another favorite josh groban video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1Ggn8OmGG4
Thank you for responding to my blog post. For a brief 2.2 seconds, I thought that you were indeed Josh Groban and my heart was bursting with excitement. Alas, I realized soon enough that you were merely an imposter, as Josh is unaware of my proclivity to read Robert Jordan and medical textbooks until the wee hours of the morning. Furthermore, Josh would know that his middle name was Winslow, not Q.
I ask the fake Josh Groban to please stand up. I can no longer sleep at night because of you; the mystery of Josh Groban continuously haunts me. I stay awake analyzing the 10 or so people who know about my blog, trying to match them up with your writing style, your knowledge of my personal interests, and your attraction to turtles. Is it possible that I have already interrogated you and you lied to me? Or have I not suspected you yet?
Either way, I would greatly appreciate a response. In my last post, I said, "Josh, if you're reading this, call me." I would like to add a "fake" to the beginning of that sentence. I'll even throw in a "please." I will be anxiously awaiting your call.
Love,
Tina
ps. I would just like to add another favorite josh groban video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1Ggn8OmGG4
posted by Tina Zhang | 12:28 PM
1 Comments:
Dearest Tina,
You raise me up. As you have clearly surmised, I am not Josh Groban. Yes, at the face of it I have (to use a crude colloquial) "duped" you, but please let this not strain our bonds of affection. My intentions were pure, if misguided; noble, if delinquent. So before you try me for my treachery -- before you condemn me to a fate worse than Barabbas', before you demand of me a pound of flesh -- I implore you to read on and then judge.
To the uninformed Internet passerby, my joke might be seen as a lark. The whim, one might say, of a capricious and not entirely benevolent laptop owner. Were this 100% the case, I would not avoid your wrath. Were this entirely my intent, I would not plead of you understanding.
No, the query most relevant at this juncture is not "Who did this?" but instead "Why did he choose to mimic Joshua Groban?"
I know I have a penchant for hyperbole, but is it not true that we all strive, in our own tiny ways, to be like Josh Groban? Does he not strike at something universal with his every keystroke, his every finely crafted lyric? It's funny; Josh was in the south of France when he wrote "Remember When It Rained." I, for one, bore witness to a terribly blustery storm in Marseille in February of this year. A lone traveler I was then, far from country and compatriots: my toothbrush my companion, my sweater my home. Did it evoke in me the same melancholy of Mr. Groban's experience? I do say that it did.
And beyond the sentiment of Josh Groban's words lies, of course, the power of his voice. For moments, it lifts us and then passes. It elevates and lilts. "You raise me up" indeed, Josh. Can I be held guilty for wanting to imitate this power, ethereal as it may be? I submit that no, I cannot.
I think you understand the crux of my defense now, Tina. But let me present it to you another way: we may all aspire to give to the world what Joshua Groban does every day, but what exactly is it that he gives? It's more than songs, surely. It must be more than notes and words and harmonies. What can we say of the soul he puts into his songs? Is his music anything less than love itself? Not to receive love (that is not our choice), but to GIVE love - that is what all of us not only can do, but indeed do accomplish. Of this I am certain, if my 22 years on God's green earth has shown me anything. Thus - and I think you'll agree with me - are we not ALL Josh Groban?
I hope you see my gesture with greater clarity. While I cannot be sure I've redeemed myself in your eyes, I do know one thing: "You're Still You." With this in mind, I find little reason to doubt you'll forgive my scheme. I look forward to the time I next may see you.
Sincerely and remorsefully,
Scholar of international law and bard of modernity, Daniel Q. Bliss
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